Dance of Fireflies
by love.hysterics
Summary: Sometimes we sacrifice ourselves for the ones we love, even if they don't remember us afterwards. HIATUS
1. Prologue

**Title:** Dance of Fireflies  
**Author:** ThirdReInCaRnAtIoN  
**Disclaimer:** Kenshin and all his little friends aren't mine. pout Besides if he was mine Battousai would be appearing a lot more and in the motion picture he would NOT have PINK hair! I'm sorry Battousai, but I just can't find pink threatening.  
**Summary:** Sometimes we sacrifice ourselves for the ones we love, even if they don't remember us afterwards. Battousai/Kaoru

**Prologue:**

_ときに　おわれて　なかば　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　むりやり　な　ひび　の　さき　に　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　は　なに　が　あります　か。_

Being chased by time,  
Living for a purpose.  
But what's there for the future?

**- Hamasaki, Ayumi**

* * *

It was an age of chaos and corruption that sired the Battousai and the darkness that preyed on the weak that called his sword into action. Yet, in this grotesque era of war, destruction and blood, he had still found his salvation, in something as simplistic as a woman.

Kaoru pondered that thought as she watched the fireflies flitter around the shadowy trees. A woman, it had taken a woman who had been the epitome of perfection to ease his pain and to soothe his nightmares.

She could only imagine his pain after she had died. To have absolute happiness within your grasp and then to have it snatched away by a cruel twist of fate. A stab of empathy speared through her and made her insides lurch with pity. He was so strong, she never would have survived. She had learnt how precious love was, and the happiness it brought – but she was intimate with the sorrow. Love returned was like blossoms on the sakura tree, blooming and unafraid to fall, unrequited love was like rain, soft and sad, rolling down the rooftops like tears.

She sighed, the soft air puffing out from between her slightly parted lips, a misty white against the moonless night. In some ways she was glad he'd found what he considered a form of redemption. That he called her home his home. That he saw them as a family, no matter how mismatched they were. In other ways she felt inadequate, feeling that she would never match up to the salvation that had sprung from his love for the one named Tomoe Yukinshio, the wife that had died by his hand.

No matter how much she loved him and wished that he'd never leave, his life was his own. He couldn't be forced to feel for her as she prayed he would. His past still called to him, it haunted him with its guilt, betrayal and sin. He was a Rurouni and he would always leave. He held no bond with her as he did to Tomoe. Together they did nothing but hold together a flimsy façade of how they pictured life should be. All his smiles she knew were pretend and that he would never smile for her – never look at her the way she wanted, no, _needed_ him to.

She felt herself sink down into a pit of solitude. The night's still, cold air traced its way over her cheeks and invaded her thin, flimsy yukata. Shuddering she wrapped her arms around herself and stared up at the mournful sky, lacking the brilliance of its shimmering moon. It was like Kenshin in a way, the thought invaded her mind before she could bat it away. They both lacked something that was vital to them, what was the sky without the moon? What was Kenshin without his soul?

He was such a kind man, with so much to offer the world. Only to be held back by those who would hold his past ideals against him. Sometimes it made her so angry. Other times, she was ambushed by a deep longing. She was nothing like Tomoe. In truth they were polar opposites, she was stubborn, brash and violent. She didn't have the manners of a lady, or the vulnerability, she wasn't fragile. How would it ever be possible for anyone to find her fit to be a wife? Much less the man she loved?

She rubbed her cold hands together and glared at them angrily. They were calloused and red. The nails were jagged and crooked from were they'd caught and been ripped off in various parts.

"Tomoe, were your hands soft and small? Did they run over his scars and sooth his hurt? Did you forgive him then? Did you forgive him for killing your fiancé, for killing you?" Her eyes stung and she forced down tears. She desperately wished, wished for one moment that she could have been Tomoe. Even if she suffered all the pain, all the heartache that Tomoe had. It would be worth it. She heaved; gasping to still what she was sure would become sobs if she didn't stop them.

She closed her eyes and quietly returned her focus to the outer world, she would force down this pain. She would not feel sorry for herself. Even if he could never love her, she would be strong. He had endured the loss of the person he loved more than anything in the world, she could do nothing more but obey his wishes if her love could not be returned. Her eyes opened sadly and she looked out across the town, across the fields and towards Kyoto where everything had started.

The land showed signs of age and weariness. The ground was hard and cold and the trees were gnarled, devoid of their leaves. But there was hope to. Small buds were beginning to sprout, showing that winter was fading slowing and with spring there would new life. Flowers were straining from the hard earth, their scent soft but still there. One in particular seemed to stand out. ''White Plum' Kaoru thought.

She slowly started to stroll down the garden path towards the trees. As she walked the fireflies hummed around her, lighting her face with a soft pale glow.

'He will always be the Hitokiri Battousai, just as he will always be the Rurouni and Kenshin. They are one person. I accept this, but there's so much I don't know about him. I said I didn't care about his past, but his past has made him who he is today. If I know nothing how can I help him? I want him to be happy. More than anything I want him to smile – truly smile for me.'

Cupping a lingering firefly in her small hands, she felt longing sear through her. She wanted to help him so badly that it pained her when he shut her out. How could she ever lessen his pain if he would not share it with her?

'If only Tomoe was still around.' Kaoru's eyes began to blur. He'd confided in Tomoe, he'd let her into his fragile mind and let her ease him into comfort. He would never let her in. He would shut her out, afraid that she would become close just like Tomoe had. He thought that if he loved Kaoru he was betraying Tomoe's memory. Two small tears fell down her cheeks. It hurt so much to know she was second best to a memory, to a woman who had long since ascended to heaven. In her grief she prayed.

'If only she hadn't died. I could stand here happily even if he loved another, if I just knew that he had finally reached some form of peace. I'd be happy if he was free. I could let him go.'

The shoji screen slid open behind her and Kenshin stepped out onto the wooden lattice work that made its way around the simplistic garden like a porch. "Is Kaoru-dono getting cold? Sessha has a blanket; he does not wish Kaoru-dono to fall ill from such bitter spring chills."

Kaoru scrubbed away evidence of her tears and turned, startled that he'd shown up so soon after his confession. She had expected him to leave her alone to her thoughts. It always seemed that it was in his nature to stray away from conflicts; physical or otherwise. If she had been acting like her usual self, he would be running – trying to avoid blows from her bokken. But she wasn't her usual self. She felt exhausted. She barely had the energy to stand and breathe let alone hit him.

Staring at his soft, scarred face, she remembered the sorrow she'd seen etched into every feature as he'd told his heartbreaking tale. Her heart constricted painfully.

'So much suffering' she thought, her insides aching.

"Will you ever be free?" she whispered to the sky.

"Oro? Free from what Kaoru-dono? Sessha does not understand"

Kaoru looked at him, and then turned away, unable to bear looking at his face any longer. It didn't seem right for him to ever know her feelings. He wasn't cruel and for him to know that every time she saw him she hurt deep inside, would hurt him too.

"It does not matter Kenshin. Go inside and rest, I will retire to my room shortly." Kenshin nodded solemnly and turned to open the shoji door once more.

"Oyasumi Nasai Kaoru-dono" he said quietly. The shoji door slid shut with a rustling sound as Kenshin went inside.

Releasing a shuddering sigh Kaoru looked down at the firefly that remained trapped in her hands. Its glow brightened her heart somewhat and she smiled gently.

"My Mother once told me that fireflies were dead souls going to heaven. She told me that if you made a wish, the firefly would carry it to heaven on its back." she paused. What would she wish for?

'Happiness' her soul cried immediately. 'For you, for him, for everyone.'

Kaoru conformed to that singular thought with every fibre of her being. For them all to be happy. She saw it in her head. Yahiko was smiling, working at the Akebeko with Tae and Tsubame. He was learning how to fight with Kenshin. She saw Sano with his arms around Megumi, both grinning as she bandaged a scrape on his arm. Her stomach was rounded with child. Finally she saw Kenshin holding onto a woman with midnight black hair. Kaoru understood. It wasn't her. She reached out and traced the woman's features as she turned. "Tomoe." Kaoru whispered as the woman's mouth widened in a smile. Breaking away from the picture she felt the ground fall from beneath her feet.

It was such an impossible task; she could no more fly than raise the dead. The firefly's wings beat between her fingertips and she smiled sadly. Her heart knew her wish. She wanted their happiness before she wanted her own. She was young; she could leave and start somewhere anew. Maybe even fall in love with someone who could love her in return.

The thought made her ache to her bones. She knew it was a lie. She could never love anyone else. Grimacing she shook off her feelings like a snake shedding skin. She knew what he needed. He needed the solace he'd once been able to find so easily, in her, in Tomoe. Her mind swam back to the vision, where her family all smiled.

"I wish someone had been able to save her." The words passed her lips, invoking agony and turmoil within her but her resolve remained firm. She felt something slip within her and part of her wondered if this was madness. She felt calm and quiet. Her inner voices had fallen into a void.

" It would save him so much pain."

The firefly batted its wings and turned to face her. It didn't move. "Please." She whispered, gently blowing it from her hand. It flickered brightly before joining its friends.

Kaoru watched for a moment longer before sliding the shoji door open and heading for her room. She never wondered what would happen if the wish came true. That night she dreamt of smiles and laughter, but it turned her skin cold. Not one of those smiles was hers.

In the courtyard the fireflies danced frantically. Swaying to and fro, gaining speed until they became blurs of light. Finally a light streaked towards the heavens and the frantic dancing stopped.

Within the ring of fireflies the light shone back down. It wavered then filled out into the ghostly shape of a girl. Eyelids fluttered to reveal dark brown eyes, and the shadowed figure's rogued lips parted. Two words fell from the lips as if falling from the pinnacle of a waterfall.

"Wish Granted"

_There was a legend among villagers of a Goddess who watched the world through fireflies. She had been a woman once, of court and it was said she had been the most beautiful. Men from all countries and status begged for her hand in marriage, each claiming to love and cherish her more than the last. She refused them all. As a child she had given her heart to her best friend – the son of a high lord and vowed that when they reached eighteen they would marry. But it was a time of war and although she remembered her promise with each breath she took. He quickly forgot. Her married another, loved another and she felt her world crumble before her. _

_She could not eat or talk and instead sat emotionless. One day news came that his wife had died and for the first time in months, a sign of life appeared in her eyes. She had wished for that woman's death so many times. She had hated her for taking something that was hers. But then she received news of how he faired. He had fallen to the madness. She wept and hated herself. In her selfishness she had wished the death of the one person that made him happy. So she prayed. Many days passed before a Kami came to her shrine. He proposed a trade. She would give herself to him and he would save her beloved. It was then she learnt that for every wish a sacrifice must be made._

* * *

**Quotacular:**

"You humans are so embarrassing, turning every little trouble into a death scene"  
-Inu Yasha


	2. Tale of the Firefly

**Title:** Dance of Fireflies  
**Author:** Third_ReInCaRnAtIoN  
**Disclaimer:** Heh,Heh,Heh. I had a debate over this with my friend. If we changed our name to the owner of Rurouni Kenshin's maker, does that mean we can claim it as our own? My name, last time I checked is still the same so I guess I still cannot claim the characters as my own. If I did, I would also stop Kenshin from dying in Kaoru's arms. Am I the only one who has a PROBLEM WITH THAT!!!!!?  
**Summary:** Sometimes we sacrifice ourselves for the ones we love, even if they don't remember us afterwards. Battousai/Kaoru

**Chapter 1:**

_Kaze o oikakete hashiru  
kimi no senaka nani o   
sagashimotometeru no?   
itsumo hitamuki na sono   
hitomi miteru dake de   
mune ga KYUN to atsuku naru yo _

Run with the wind that   
blows at your back   
What is the wish you're seeking?   
Always facing you, I only have to look in your eyes:   
In my chest, my heart pounds with heat  


**- Tange, Sakura**

Kaoru tossed and turned in her sleep. Her dreams of unholy horrors danced before her eyes. Images of torn flesh, glaring amber eyes and heart pounding fear made her spine tingle and her heart palputated in her chest. She'd never dreamt like this before. Never had her nightmares been so violent and utterly terrifying. It was the flashing eyes that scared her the most, those eyes that seemed uncanily like Kenshin's, but with a darker, shadowed look. Almost as if they'd known every kind of betrayal and sadness.

A shudder passed through her body as she wrenched herself from her sleep. Opening her eyes she felt a strange kind of disorientation. Like perhaps she didn't belong here. She pushed it away angrily. 'Why would you feel as if you didn't belong in your own dojo, baka' she thought angrily to herself. Angrily she wiped the bluriness from her eyes.

Someone wrapped on the outside of her bedroom door. "Miss, are you awake?" Kaoru sat stilled. The voice was that of a female and no one she knew would ever address her as a 'Miss' in any shape of the word. But it had sounded so familiar. "Who is there?" She asked cautiously. The lessons her father taught her started to kick in.  
'Papa said that the first rule was to never let the enemy see fear or confusion, for that is where they will first strike' A pause followed Kaoru's words. Then the gentle voice continued. "Forgive me Miss, you must be confused. We found you this morning lying infront of the dojo gates, you seemed to have passed out. My husband said that we should let you rest here until you are well." Kaoru's eyes widened.

She'd suddenly remembered where she'd heard that polite female voice before. "Mama" she whispered to herself. She shook her head. 'How could it be possible?' she thought. 'Don't be foolish Kaoru. It's probably Tae playing with you and she's come to give you some food because Yahiko's been complaining down at the Akebeko about your cooking' But no matter how she tried to dismiss the thought that her Mother was standing opposite the shoji door, it kept coming back to haunt her. Finally Kaoru came to a conclusion. "You may come in" she said firmly. The only way to stop the riddiculous thoughts running through her head was to kill them with the simple truth that her Mother had been dead for many years and was no coming back.

The shoji door slid open and was snapped shut again by the lady that had walked in. As she turned Kaoru gave a startled gasp. The woman that stood before her was roughly the age of 23 with long black hair, it framed her porcelin face and fell to her waist. Kaoru's eyes then roamed over the woman's face. The shape of the face itself was an oval. The lady's eyes were a startling honey brown that glinted blue in the wispy rays of sunlight that shone through the curtained window. Kaoru's heart ceased movement and for a second she was sure that she'd died in her sleep somehow and gone to heaven.

That thought faded however when the lady tripped over her kimono and fell forward landing in Kaoru's lap. She smiled sheepishly, and jumped back blushing horrendously. "I'm s-so sorry Miss! I'm very clumsy you see, I-I, well, I'm the wife of a Sword Master and I have no co-oridination. The only thing he's asked me to do for him is cook, I'm afraid that I'm not much good for anything else." Kaoru smiled and ignored the pain in her leg on which her mother had landed. She was sure of it now. This lady was her mother. The way that she'd been so clumsy and her facial features alone were enough to confirm it. Add to the that the fact that Kaoru recognised her voice and she knew she was more than possitive.

"Oh, that's okay....what is your name?" Kaoru asked politley. She knew that she couldn't just blurt out 'Hey look at me, did you know I'm your daughter and I'm somehow stuck here, where I seem to be reliving the past and I don't know why!'. Kaoru was pretty positive that saying that would be the fastest way to be slammed into a cell with doctors visiting her everyday. "My name is Kamiya Rukea." Rukea bowed and nodded. "And what is your name Miss?" Kaoru smiled. "My name is......" she paused.

'I can't possibly tell her my real name! She'll think I'm insane!' Kaoru scratched her head.Then she said the first thing that came to her mind. "My name is...Himura! Ahem, I mean, My name is Himura, Kaoru" Rukea laughed. "You have such a beautiful name!" Kaoru blushed. It was one thing to use Kenshin's last name, but it was another to have someone tell you that your name sounded beautiful that way.

Rukea kneeled down by the foot of Kaoru's bed. "So Miss Himura, are you feeling better now?" Kaoru remembered that earlier Rukea'd told her how she'd been found outside the dojo gates. "I'm better now thank you." she replied. Rukea nodded. "What happened to you Miss Himura?" Kaoru waved her hand. "Please call me Kaoru." Rukea smiled cheerfully. Then she frowned. "You were not come apon by a hitokiri were you? That must've been so dreadful!. You were not with company were you, you're husband was not harmed I hope!" Kaoru blinked. "I'm not married" she blurted out. Rukea's eyes widened. "Not married! No wonder we found you outside the dojo! You must've been overcome by thugs! They linger on the streets these days, it's a horrid era we live in."

"Oh Kaoru-chan!" Rukea continued. "Poor girl, what happened? Did they hurt you?!" Kaoru's mind whirled ferociously. 'How will you explain this!' she asked herself angrily. She'd somehow been transported to the past with no idea why or how. 'Is this the doing of Kami?' she wondered. Glancing at her Mother's expression she knew that she had to think of something fast! Her mouth opened, explainations on the tip of her tongue.

A small angry voice cut off her voice. "Mama!!! Haruko-kun's teasing me again!!!" Rukea let loose a small sigh and smiled apologetically. "That's my daughter, she shares your first name funnily enough. Kisatsu, my husband, as I said earlier is a Sword Master, he takes on many students each year. Unfortunatley his student Haruko-kun and my little Kaoru don't get along very well. I think they're both strong willed and refuse to believe that they are ever wrong."

Kaoru was about to tell her that she wasn't stubbon, that in fact she let people voice their opinions often. But the words didn't make it from her mouth. The shoji door snapped open and an angry young girl stamped in. Her arms were folded and a cross pout was twisted about her mouth. "Oh Kaoru, what have you done now?"

Little Kaoru scowled. "It wasn't me Mama! It was Haruko kun!!! He pushed me and I fell in the mud!! Look at my yukata Mama! It's ruined. Then Papa told me off for smaking Haruko kun with my bokken!" Rukea shook her head and sighed again. "Oh Kaoru, Papa expects you to be a polite girl, that's why he was mad and we can wash the dirt from that yukata." Little Kaoru sniffled. "I don't care Mama, I hate Haruko kun and I hate Papa, I'm never going to speak to them again!!!!!!"

Rukea gasped. "Kaoru! Don't say that about your Papa! And to be so crude infront of our Guest!" Kaoru smiled at the younger version of herself. She remembered this day. Haruko in her opinion was a little baka. He was always such a horrible little boy but he grew to be a humble, smart man. Still she felt a misplaced indignation rise within her. After all these years, she realised, she still believed that was Haruko's fault for her poor yukata. "No, it's okay." Kaoru said firmly. "I don't believe that there is a world in which there cannot be conflict." She turned to the version of her younger self.

"Hello, my name is Himura Kaoru, pleased to meet you." She held out her hand which the little girl took eagerly. "My name's Kaoru too!" the younger version of Kaoru said, past anger suddenly forgotten.  
Her eyes lit up and she bounded around the room. Then she aruptly stopped. "Mama! Look, it's getting dark. Can you take me out and show me the Light Souls?" Kaoru glanced out the window suprised that night time was there already. Then again, she didn't know how long she'd been unconcious.

Rukea nodded to her daughter. "Okay Karou-sweetie," she turned to the larger Kaoru. "Would you like to come out also?" Kaoru nodded eagerly. There was nothing for her to do inside and she must've been asleep for over 12 hours. "Sure, I'd love to go outside, it seems like I've been cooped up all day sleeping!" Rukea chuckled. "Just be careful though, there are some steps down to the garden that I always seem to trip over." Kaoru laughed. 'That isn't really saying much Mother' she thought. 'I'm glad I have my Papa's co-ordination.

******

"Aren't the stars so beautiful?" Minature Kaoru asked. The sun had set and let it's crimson light fade until the sky had become a dark blue. The stars and moon sat in the sky, the moon acting as the night's halo and the stars, shimmers of fairydust. 'Ahhhhhh' Kaoru thought. 'I certainly had an eye for beauty when I was younger.' Images of Kenshin smiling and looking adorable with utter confusion slid into her mind. 'I guess I still do' she chuckled, a small smile gracing her lips.

"Mama, will you tell me the story of the Light Souls again?" Rukea sat down on the garden bench. "Miss Himura, would you like to hear my tale? It's about the goddess of the fireflies; Hontaru." Kaoru nodded. "Hai, I'd like to."

'It's odd, that I was only thinking about fireflies last night and suddenly I'm in the past, being told the story once again by my mother. Perhaps this is a dream, a dream that'd I'd gladly dream forever if only Kenshin,Yahiko, Sanosuke and all my other friends were here' Finding a soft peice of grass she sat herself down and got comfortable.

"_ It was a long time ago, some say it predates history itself, some say that it dates back to when the Sun Goddess locked herself away in the caves and the world was in perpetual darkness. There was a girl. She was a beautiful girl, pale snow skin, long ebony hair, red lips and the most peculiar eyes. Her eyes seemed so bright, yellow, green, orange her eyes changed their colour to match the rainbow. She was so beautiful that many men admired her and wished to take her for their bride. But she was a stubbon girl, she never took any of their hands, neither the rich, nor poor, nor handsome, nor brave. She would take no hand until she found her true love."_

"Her heart was bound to the notion of love. One day she met a knight. A samurai warrior, who was loyal and true. When she saw him her heart started beating faster and faster. She had fallen for this man. With his steel eyes and firm lean body. She wanted to belong to him. But he would not have her. Not for all her beauty or spirit would he love her or make her his wife. So she despaired. She loved him dearly, but she found he was already in love with another. She'd never before felt as if she'd never been pretty enough or smart enough to have someone worthy of her love but now she wondered. Then one day the news came that his love had been killed in battle. Instead of being happy an overwhelming fear took over her. When her beloved recieved the news that his fiance had died he went into a terrible rage."

And Hontaru's heart broke seeing him in such a state. Ruled by his grief and stuck in an agony that would never end.So she cried for him and took up a pilgrimage. She swore that if he could never find true love than neither would she. So she went to the nearest Shinto shrine and prayed. For seven days she sat, without sleep, not water nor food. On the seventh day she died. She floated into a sleep that no one could wake her from. On the sunset of the seventh day, the warrior she loved so dearly came to pray for his dead love. There he found Hontaru lying infront of a statue of kami. He walked towards her and dropped his sword. He'd known that she'd loved him but had refused to adknowledge her, refused to believe that she truely loved him like the other girl did."

"He sat her down and listened for any sign of a heartbeat but there wasn't one. He noticed that she was clutching at something tightly in the palm of her hand. Carefully he pulled her hand open and was amazed to see a flittering little light. You see, in the days that Hontaru was praying she'd been asking kami if she could die, she'd willingly give her soul, if she could come back to earth every full moon and grant the wish of a person who's soul was crying about a love that it could not have."

"Kami agreed, he didn't own a soul that was as beautiful as Hontaru, so he granted her this favour. But he gave her one condition. She could grant the wishes of those who mourned unrequiented love, but the wishes they made could not be for themselves nor for the one they loved. That left limited options. Not many people could think of a wish, but then one day Hontaru went to a women who was crying because her love no longer wanted her, she was not as pretty as she used to be and he'd found a sweetheart that was young and vibrant. He'd thrown the girl away like trash. So Hontaru went to grant her wish."

"Now, what this girl suddenly lacked in looks, she made up for in smarts. She wished that those who loved her would have a good life. Hontaru granted this wish happily but there was a side effect that she hadn't been expecting. From the wish granted tiny lights shot forth. They became the light in dark times and the hope for love lost. They became known as Hontaru or Firefly in honor of their creator. It is said that sometimes the wishes are granted in secret and sometimes she shows her face. But whatever she does she always grants a wish. Even if she sometimes meddles." 

Kaoru's face paled as the tale finished. How could she have been so stupid? _"I wish that I could stop Tomoe Yukinshio from being killed, it will grieve me, but it would save him so much pain."_ Somehow the wish had become muddled. She hadn't meant that she wanted to go back in the past to save Tomoe. She'd only meant that her **wish** could've done something to save her. "Perfect" she muttered under her breath. Rukea watched Kaoru's strange mutterings. "I'm afraid that I must put this little one to bed" she said, pointing to a sleeping little Kaoru curled up in her mother's kimono. "If you wish I will escort you to your room." Kaoru sighed.

"No, I'm alright. I must go out into the town now anyway, I've just remembered that I'm searching for someone." Rukea's eyes went comically wide. "No, Miss Himura! You mustn't! As I told you before this is an unstable era, especially for those without husbands, men will try to take advantage of your weakness!" Kaoru waved away her Mother's concern. "I'll be fine, but perhaps I could borrow your bokken? I've had some training with swords you see and I should be able to protect myself if trouble arises."

Rukea paused, then handed her precious load over to Kaoru. "Hang on to her and I'll just grab one, I think Kisatsu keeps his spare bokkens in the Training Hall." Kaoru watched as her mother sped off, stumbling over invisable obstacles on her way. Sighing Kaoru sat down on the small bench and nursed a tiny Kaoru on her lap. Little Kaoru's eyes fluttered open. "Miss Himura?" Kaoru nodded. Then her face became serious. "Listen to me Kaoru, be nice to your Mama okay? She's a very delicate woman and she's very precious to both you and your Papa. So never forget to tell her you love her and always behave the best you can. She won't be around forever."

Visions of her Mother's death haunted her memories. Minature Kaoru looked up at her in confusion. "Miss Himura.....I don't understand" Kaoru looked at the returning figure of her mother and sighed wistfully. "It's okay Kaoru, just remember what I said okay?" Baby Kaoru nodded and drifted back off to sleep. Rukea ran over waving a bokken at Kaoru, stumbling over stones she tripped and landed with an 'oof'.

Kaoru winced as she heard the thud, followed by the snap. Opening her eyes she saw her suspicions confirmed. The bokken Rukea had been carring was now snapped in half. Rukea pulled herself upright and started bowing. "Oh, gosh! I'm sorry! I'll get another one! I'm so sorry." Kaoru laughed slightly and passed the sleeping child back to it's mother. "That's fine Mrs Kamiya, I don't need a weapon really, I'll be fine." Rukea's face borded on worry and concern. "Okay Miss Himura, if you say so. Will you be coming back after tonight?"

Kaoru thought about this. "Yes, I probably will. I don't think that I'll find him right tonight. I'm just going to look for some leads." Rukea beamed. "Oh good Miss Himura! I'll cook for you tomorrow! A wonderous meal to make up for my clumsiness." Kaoru shook her head and smiled. "It's not necessary, but thank you." She leaned forward and gave the sleeping child and her mother a hug. Turning away she whispered. "Goodbye Mother"

Rukea watched as the strange,young,remarkable woman she'd just met walked through the dojo gates. There was something so strange about her that she just couldn't put her finger on. Like the way she seemed so familiar. She was also strong and gracious. 'She even knows how to fight' Rukea thought. Looking at her sleeping daughter she giggled. "Now my sweet pet, I hope you turn out a bit like her."

******

Kaoru wondered the streets, ignoring the dark alleyways and the drunk men walking around stupidly and it could almost pass for something....okay, well she was trying to fool herself. None of it made her feel safe or reminded her of her time. It was unfamiliar and scary. Foreign territory but in her own home. Shuddering she felt the feeling that someone was watching her. She began to walk a little bit faster, but the prickily feeling was still there so she started to run and headed for the nearest building

Without looking she walked in and sat down at a table. The bickering and yelling that echoed around her suddenly stopped. She looked up from her table huffing. She'd run so quickly and now she just wanted to catch her breath. Suddenly her breathing ceased altogether. These men...this place. Her face slowly started to heat up. She'd walked into a Geisha tea house, where prostitution and gambling spread their infested ideals into people's minds and she'd just run in looking like a complete idiot.

Gulping Kaoru stepped backwards away from the table, wishing desperatley that her bokken was beside her. One man laughed and stepped forward. "What have we here? Another pretty to add to my collection of women tonight?" Kaoru growled disgusted. "No, I'm not a whore and even if I was I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole that had a 1000 mile extention!" His eyes hardened and Kaoru smacked herself mentally. 'Kaoru, you dumb baka! Jump off a cliff you wanna die this quickly!'

The angry man advanced and drew his sword. Stepping backwards Kaoru looked around for a weapon. Spying and intoxicated man who was sitting near by, she grabbed the sword that hung limply in his hands. "Ah, so the pretty wants to fight? Bring it on precious, but when I win I expect you to.." Kaoru cut him off. "You finish that sentence and I'll castrate you."

The man laughed. "Hear that Boys!" He yelled to the others behind him. "You think we can take her!?" The other men mummured their approval. Meanwhile Kaoru was once again smacking herself mentally. 'You know just how to get killed don't you Kaoru, if you don't win this they're gonna rape you y'know.' Kaoru growled at herself. 'Shut Up Brain, no one's asking you to speak, where are you when I say this stupid stuff?'

A quiet voice suddenly broke through the noisy voices. "I think that you should leave now." Kaoru looked up to see a red haired stranger standing infront of her. 'KENSHIN?' her mind yelled. He turned to look at her sensing an increase in ki. Looking up at his eyes she recoiled. The eyes were the ones from her dream. Sad and hard, harsh and unforgiving. He gave her a calculating stare then returned his attention to the swordsman.

"If you know what's good for you, you'll leave now and leave this girl alone." The men chuckled loudly. "And what would you do to us, your no more than a girl youself!" Kenshin pulled his sword from it's sheath. Kaoru gulped. There was no way she could let Kenshin attack, he'd kill these men instantly. She knew that these men probably deserved death, but their death would haunt Kenshin's soul.

Kaoru put a restraining hand on his arm. "No," then she turned to the burly men. "You should listen to him. Leave now." Kenshin shrugged away from her eyes blazing. "Why would you ask me to stop? Would you rather me leave you to them? Because I would have no problem with that." Kaoru shook her head frantically. "I told you to stop because I know that you would kill them"

The Battousai stilled but his muscles tensed. Spinning around her held the tip of his sword to her throat. "How would you know what I'd do?" Kaoru gulped as the sword nicked her neck. A small trail of blood trailed down her neck. A sudden movement caught Kaoru's eye and she saw the man charge Kenshin from behind. She moved quickly. "Look out!" she yelled.

Kenshin turned suddenly and scewered the charging man with his katana. "I warned you" he said in the cold quiet voice he'd used earlier. There was no emotion, just a monotone that frightened Kaoru out of her skin.

He withdrew his sword from the man's body and swept out the door. Kaoru stood shocked. The other men ignored her, too busy fawning over the dead body of their 'leader'. Kaoru made a hasty desicion and swept out after him

******

The streets were dark and not even the brilliant moon could light the path on which she walked. She didn't want to admit it, but she was afraid. Afraid of what could happen to her in the dark. Walking awkwardly on the cobblestones she came to an arupt halt when she realised that she didn't know where she was. She'd lost him, not that she was surprised. He was a hitokiri, it was in his nature to be elusive.

Sighing, she abandoned her search for the Battousai. She'd look for him again tomorrow, after a long rest. Kaoru turned around and headed back towards to dojo. 'How am I ever going to find Kenshin?' she pondered. 'He's a Shadow in a town full of darkness. It's almost impossible!' Flicking her hair over her shoulder she stormed through the streets, her ki flaring, warning those who'd harm her that she was **not** in the mood.

******

Snuggling into her futon Kaoru reflected over the day's events. It was strange, the fact that she'd found Kenshin so easily and then lost him just as quickly. Her eyes started to droop and she struggled to keep her mind focused. But as we all know that fighting a lulling sleep is to fight a losing war and soon Kaoru found herself submersed in the land of dreams.

_The streets were running with blood. It was everywhere, it was splattered up walls and on the grass. It made Kaoru's spine tingle with fear. The blood itself was a statement that she no longer was in her own time. Clutching her hands together she prayed to Kami-sama that the danger she sensed and the ki that was overwelming her senses was not this man before her. His face was hidden by shadow but she could see the gleam of his sword. The blood was still red, running down the blade's surface in tiny droplets. He flicked the blood away and pointed the sword at her. "I'm sorry, but you must die"   
Kaoru gasped short of breath and stepped backwards. Before she knew what was happening the man was right in her face. Her eyes widened as a sword rammed through her body.  
"Kenshin?"  
His face blurred before her eyes as she passed out._

Kaoru woke, sweat drenching her features. Groaning she slumped further into her cushions. "I'm never going to be able to sleep, why am I having all these nightmares!" she hissed. Smothering her face with her pillow she closed her eyes and tried to even her breath. As she again succumbed to sleep, she didn't see the amber eyes that were staring through her window, nor the way they roamed her with a familiarity they could not place.

  
  
  


**'Carnation's Comments**

Hey guys! I have the next chapter up! I also got twice the amount of reviews I hoped for!   
Thank You!  
I need to know if people want me to have chapters based on how things are going in Kaoru's time and how Kenshin's reacting to her sudden "dissapearance". Just Vote for it you want those chapters or not in the reviews okay!  
Now, for the people that reviewed:  


**SilverLightening:** Sad and Creepy? I hope that the following chapters will be better! I don't want people too freaked out and stop reading!

**Zhen Ji:** I'm glad you liked it!!!

**Ferai:** Sorry for the confusion, it's not Tomoe that came back, it's a girl called Hontaru that grants wishes for people who suffer from unrequeinted love. This chapter probably helped clear up your confusion. ^_^ Kaoru/Battousai fanfics rock!

**Nicky:** Okay, Kenshin does love Kaoru but he has the obligation to Tomoe. He's scared to love Kaoru. He doesn't love Tomoe anymore but in the past (the timeline for this fic) he will love Tomoe but I'm going to put twists and there will be a kind of love rectangle.

**Cherry Chibi:** Thank You!!!! I'm sooooooo happy that you loved it. I hope this chapter does the story proud ^_^ *peace*

**Chris:** Yes, Kaoru does have a big heart. Sometimes I wonder how she puts up with Kenshin. *sweatdrop* He's so stupid. Enjoy this chapter

**Nanaki lover/Brukaoru:** Wow! You put me on ur fav story list!!!!!! *squeals* Thank you! I'm SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**soralvr926:** This chapter's for you because you wanted to read it! I'm grinning *GRIN* because you think that my writing is brilliant. Cheers!

**emsdesire:** Woah! You gave me my loooooooooooooongest review! I have no idea what to say to you because your review made me more than happy, I was estatic! I've never had someone tell me that I had the potential to make this a good story. ^_^!!!! So thank you!!!!!!!!!!

**disturbed-demon-gurl:**I'm glad you know what it's like to want to be loved ^_^ I just hope people really enjoy this story! I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well.

**lighthawk:** *tee hee hee* Wow! You're really enthusiastic about my story! *hehehehehe!* *bows* Thankies!

** Okay People I Thank You All for Your Wonderful Reviews! But Please Don't take that as a Sign to stop! Noooooo! Please continue to give me REVIEWS!!! Don't be afraid!!!! Okay....I'm even scaring myself now, so....I'll stop that. But please, I'm being honest. I'd really like reviews. It's like having Christmas when I get reviews. So Pretty Please, if you enjoyed this Chapter Review.**

Now, here's the Teaser:

**Chapter 2:**

She had no idea what to make of this. He was just standing there staring at her. She wasn't scared, but she felt....exposed. He was gazing down into her and she couldn't stop him from doing it. Finally she regained the use of her voice. "If you touch him Battousai, you'll be so sorry." He snorted and pulled out his other sword and pointed it at her. "And you are you to think you could stop me?" Baby Kaoru came out from behind her mother. "She's Miss Himura! And if you don't leave my Papa alone she's gonna hurt you!!!!!!" The Battousai's eyes widened and the sword clattered to the ground.

**Quotacular:**

Fate leads him who will, he who won't she drags  
-Roman Saying


	3. Carnation Speaks

There was a problem with the posting and the wrong message went up *blush*. This was the original. 

**'Carnation's Apology:**

  
  


_I'm so sorry to all my readers this week!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've been really really busy and I haven't had a chance to write anymore of **'Dance of Fireflies'**. Add to that the fact that I'm sick, (I have a cold that came with; headache, fever, delusions, throwing up and loss of the ability to walk) and you can see that the story would have come out with spelling mistakes and weird grammar. I hope to have recovered at to have posted the next chapter by next Sunday. I apologize for all this, but I promise that the next chapter will be longer and better and if I can manage it I may even post two chapters at once, (though I wouldn't hold your breath).  
Now I have to skip to the kitchen and grab some panadol for my head ^_^ So check here next Sunday and there should be something. For now I have to go off and finish my 2 Math Assignments, my 3 Japanese Assignments and my Ancient History Assignment. Now if only I had spell check to check them, I might become delusional again and see Inu Yasha sitting on my little pile of work.....hmmmm......I could say the dog ate my homework!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hahahahahaha!!!* *hack, hack, cough, cough*  
Okay, it's time for me to go, I'm losing my voice and I can't talk out loud or think about what I'm saying. So before I embarrass myself and people decide they no longer want to read this story.................................................  
Goodbye!  
Ja ne!  
Matane  
_

**-Third_ReInCaRnAtIoN**


	4. It Begins

**Title:** Dance of Fireflies  
**Author:** Third_ReInCaRnAtIoN  
**Disclaimer:**I am disclaiming, I am disclaiming, look at me sing the disclaiming song!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! br> **Summary:** Sometimes we sacrifice ourselves for the ones we love, even if they don't remember us afterwards. Battousai/Kaoru

**Chapter 2:**

_The reverse side also has a reverse side.The same can be said of swords,_

**- Japanese Proverb**

Kaoru panted and she swung the bokken for the 600th time. It was hard work trying to keep in shape, but she knew that she had other reasons that made her practice. Last night in that bar she'd been as defenceless as a blind puppy. If Battousai hadn't shown up then she would've been in a lot of trouble.

Growling to herself she stepped forward to strike with her wooden sword. "You know Miss Himura, you have alot of skill, but you waste your energy. Do not think so much about where the sword must strike and how hard it must hit. Loosen your grip and know that the sword will protect you. Believe in the sword and yourself and it will protect you."

Kaoru turned and gave her father a small smile. "You tell me this, yet your own grip on life is like the way I hold my sword, tight. If there is no room for it to move, there is no chance that it will stray from the intended path and strike some other goal instead." Kisatsu gave her a calculated glance. "You presume to know me so well? I take that as arrogance" He pulled himself into a fighting stance. "And arrogance has no home in my dojo."

Laughing, Kaoru sheathed her own bokken. "I have no wish to fight you, you brought me in from the streets as I was ill and I have no will to hurt you or your family. The secrets I know about you will be kept as such, secrets that would only be let free by a vile tongue." Turning from him she began once more to practice.

Kisatsu watched her form and found himself surprised. Her movements resembled his, but they shifted in feminine ways. Her form twisted where his would not. Her strikes were calculated, intended for imobilising, not maiming. She too practiced the Kamiya Kasshin. But how he could not say. The style that she exibited was his, but he'd only taught one student. Maybe the form he had created was linked to some older style of fighting. Had he unintentionally copied an ancient art?

He watched her weakness and frowned. The weakness was like his own, but on her it could be fixed. If she was attacked again, she'd be able to fight well, it could save her life. "Stop swinging to your left. It's too difficult for your body to manuver the weight of the sword. Try swinging it above your goal. It's harder to aim with a bokken than with a katana, but at least a bokken wll not kill. Adjust your grip. It's still too tight. Try and loosen it slightly, it gives your wrist more movement and when you swing your arm it doesn't feel as heavy."

Kaoru felt the sweat pooling in the back of her yukata and sliding down her legs and arms. Somewhere between grimacing and smiling, she remembered what lessons with her father meant. It meant pain and annoyance. Anger and control. He'd test all her limits and she knew that once he'd decided to teach her there would be agony and protesting muscles. It seemed as if she'd be revisiting her child hood pains if the determined look on his face was anything to go by.

He was going to teach her. There was something in her face that reminded him of his daughter. She could have been his elder daughter if it came down to it. She shared the same delicate features as his wife, yet her eyes were the same colour as his. His stubbon nature. He almost wished that she was his daughter. He could envision a life with her here. A role model for little Kaoru, someone respectable and kind. Not so gracious that they were weak and submissive, not like some of the market women.

The market women would cry and whimper about their hardships. Not grin and bear them with a cheery exposition and a sword. Not like this Miss Himura did. Keeping his face impassive he watched her powerful lunges and counter attacks as she fought her shadow opponent. There was grace there that his other student Haruko did not possess.

"How long do you plan to stay Miss Himura?" Kaoru's face turned solem. "I'm not sure, I plan to find my friend then perhaps head off with his people. I do not know how long that may be though, I will resume my search for my friend later today. It was stupid of me to head out last night. I caught a sight of my friend, but I lost him before we could talk."

Kisatsu nodded. "You are welcome to stay here and become my student. You have alot of potential and I believe that you could soon be a Master of my Kamiya Kasshin style. 

Kaoru's face took on an excited gleam. "Really?! I'd love to become a Master of this style. It's movements entrance me and I know that this style could save my life if I used it in the right way." Grunting Kisatsu nodded.

"One should never underestimate the power of protection." Kaoru nodded. "It is when we are willing to protect that our power is the strongest, because we are not fighting for ourselves but for someone else."

"Uun... Anyway, the reason that I have interupted your practice is because breakfast is ready, do you wish to dine with us this morning?" Kaoru paused and contemplated for a moment. She really didn't have time to spend with her family. The sooner she saved Tomoe, the sooner she'd be back at the dojo. 'Yeah Kaoru, back to a dojo where Yahiko detests your guts, Sano's too busy bludging and Kenshin's clueless as ever.'

'Why did I want to go back again? I could do just fine here. I'd have my family and myself.' Sighing she remembered that it wouldn't be fair on her younger self if she just moved into the family and she'd miss Yahiko,Sano and Kenshin anyway. She was being wishful and selfish when she thought of staying in the past. She'd wished to come to the past so she could help Kenshin and that's what she'd do.

"I would like to join you," she blurted out. "But, I'm afraid that I will only be able to stay for a short while, I must start searching for my friend soon lest he move and I lose him again." She smiled, satisfied with her answer. She had to get herself out of temptation's way or she'd be in trouble and she hadn't been lying when she'd said that she had to get a move on finding Ken.....er.....Battousai. If he left on an 'assignment' in another town, she'd never be able to find him and that in turn meant she'd never get back to her own time.

Kisatsu bowed slightly. "Follow me Miss Himura, I'll show you to the dining room." Kaoru shifted the bokken and placed it in her belt. "I hope you don't mind if I borrow this bokken when I go into town do you?" Kisatsu gave her a sharp look. "I would be angry if you forgot to take it Miss. My wife and daughter seem to idolise you and if you were harmed I'm sure I'd be in trouble with them. Now please, this way."

******

Kaoru watched in awe as Rukea managed to pour green tea without spilling it halfway down her robes. 'It's amazing, she has the worst co-ordination in the world, yet she manages to pour tea when I can't.' Kisatsu picked up his cup and fumbled it, he caught it of course, but the contents had ended up in Kaoru's lap. Yelping, Kaoru lept to her feet. "Itai! That's hot!!!" Little Kaoru giggled and passed her some towels. "Chichiue does that all the time! He's horrible with domestic stuff like cooking! His cooking is yuck!" Giggling again miniture Kaoru nibbled on her breakfast.

Kaoru looked at her younger self. 'Well, your cooking becomes horrible in the future too!' Rukea glanced at Kaoru's kimono. "It's do use Miss Kaoru. I'm sorry, but that kimono is ruined." Kaoru threw the towels down in frustration. "I have nothing else to wear and my money isn't here." Sitting back down at the table, she played around with her food. Rukea slid a glance to Kisatsu and jerked her head in Kaoru's direction.

Kisatsu looked at her quizically, then nodded. Clearing his throat her started to speak. "This is my fault Miss Himura, please feel free to buy yourself a new kimono or use one of Rukea's. We do not mind and if you are to become a student you shall be boarding here anyway." Kaoru turned to Rukea in confirmation. She nodded and Kaoru sighed happily. "Is it okay if I go change now? The tea is still quite hot." Rukea nodded and waved her hand in an excusing gesture. Kaoru leapt from the table and headed for the main bedroom.

******

Kaoru rummaged through her mother's wardrobe. 'She's so fragile and delicate. All her clothes scream it. There's nothing here that would suit me! I'm neither fragile and certainly not delicate!' Finally she found a wrinkled kimono tucked far away at the back of the cuboard. It was beautiful, yet it was also strong and feminine. It was a dark wine red colour with golden silk emboidered into the shape of tiny, fierce dragons.

She quickly changed and looked at her self in the mirror. She looked amusing with her beautiful kimono and a bokken slipped into the obi. She'd taken the tie from her hair and wrapped it round the handle of her wooden sword. It was very dirty, with stains and she didn't wish to have it anywhere near her hair. But with her hair unbound flowing down around her elbows, she resembled a female warrior. Perhaps even the embodiment of the dragons on her clothes.

A shriek echoed from the kitchen and Kaoru started. Her eyes went wide and she started running out of the room and down the corridor towards where the scream had come from.

******

Kaoru however, was not prepared for the sight that met her. The breakfast table was upturned with miso soup and green tea flooding the floor. China was broken and thrown halfway across the room. Kaoru tiptoed over it carefully. Someone had attacked them while she'd been gone. A scenerio began to form in her head. Rukea had screamed when their attacker or attackers had come. Kisatsu had ordered her to take little Kaoru out of harms way and run.

From there he'd fought whomever had attacked. A fierce cry broke the silence and Kaoru turned once more to the direction of the yell. She ran to the shouji door and opened it quietly. She needed to sneak up on her opponent/s if she was to be of any help.

She stalked down the garden path, her hand hovering over her bokken. Another cry split the air and she broke into a run and headed towards to dojo.

******

Never in her life had she seen so much blood. It dribbled down the dojo's porch and pooled on the petals of the flowers in the garden. Kaoru wasn't sure but she thought she could see a dismembered arm amoungst the foliage. Shuddering she walked with silent footsteps up the stairs.

Slipping through the door she snuck down the hallway until she reached the main part of the dojo. Blood was splattered up the walls and the disgust she felt mingled with the nausea in her stomach. She heard a vicious snarl and she shivered. Fear wrapped it's fingers around her neck and she shook.

Opening the door she stepped in confidently...well trying to seem it and pulled out her bokken. Her eyes widened as she took in the image presented to her. There were bodies strewn about the place. Some were decapitated, their heads rolling around, the blood still flowing freely. Other bodies had just been slashed carelessly. Lines of blood down their foreheads that spurted out in a spray of crimson.

Kaoru gagged but held her sword up. Whomever had done this was very skilled and they were after her father. Heaving a shuddering breath she brought her eyes to the center of the room. Amber eyes glared at her, shadowed by flaming red hair.

Her posture changed and she brought the sword before her. "Why are you here Battousai?" She glanced behind him and saw her father standing protectively infront of a whimpering Rukea and her younger self. She saw anger and determination in her younger self's eyes and the twinkle that appeared when their eyes locked.

"I knew you'd help us!" she yelled out and grabbed her mother's dress when Battousai gave her a firey glance. Kaoru groaned and started walking towards them when Battousai's sword flew out pointed at her throat. "Why do you presume you can save them?" he asked coldly. "They are part of my assignment and if you stand in my way, I will kill you."

Kaoru managed to send him a deadly sneer, looking the part of an avenging war goddess. "They have taken care of me, and if you wish to harm them, you will fight me first." Kaoru's mind went into a frantic panic. 'What the hell are you doing challenging the Battousai to a fight?'. Battousai saw the trace of fear and scowled. "Stand down, you're not worth my time." He turned away to face Kisatsu.

Kaoru saw red. She moved forwards and brought her bokken down in a stike. Battousai only managed to block it in time. His eyes narrowed. He didn't think that she'd have it in her. But her will to protect was strong. "I said," she started angrily. "That you WOULD HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME FIRST!" she finished in a yell. Battousai fell into an attacking stance and Kaoru drew her bokken back into a defensive possition. Kaoru's eyes widened however when Kisatsu started to attack him from behind.

Kaoru watched the quick flurry of movements and barely could comprehend them. In her mind's eye she could see them fighting clearly but the way they moved, it was nothing short of terrifying. She saw her father's moves of protecting. Willing the sword to save his family. But the will of the Battousai was scary, his sword so intent of death that not even the will to protect could stop it.

Kaoru watched as Battousai prepared to deal out the death strike. Picking up a sword from a dead warriors body she threw it at him. She knew her aim sucked. She didn't need proof or to be told. But she watched in horror as the sword flew right at him. Horror gripped at her. If she'd killed him, then he'd never have the chance to change, never become someone she'd met and loved. Without a second throught she yelled out a warning. "Kenshin!"

Battousai turned and dodged the sword then swung around so that his sword was now at Kisatsu's throat. He turned and gave Kaoru a disbelieveing look. Kaoru fidgited. Battousai's stare grew more intense and Kisatsu looked at her surprised. "You called his real name?" He asked her softly. She avoided her father's gaze and looked at her feet. She hadn't meant to yell his real name, it was reflex after seeing Kenshin in so many fights. Battousai's hand itched to slice her but something held him back. "Look at me" he commanded.

Kaoru blinked, confused. But she didn't refuse his request. She brought her gaze upwards and let it rest on his unreadable gold eyes. After a few minutes she began to fidget again.

She had no idea what to make of this. He was just standing there staring at her. She wasn't scared, but she felt....exposed. He was gazing down into her and she couldn't stop him from doing it. Finally she regained the use of her voice. "If you touch him Battousai, you'll be so sorry." He snorted and pulled out his other sword and pointed it at her. "And who are you to think you could stop me?" Baby Kaoru came out from behind her mother. "She's Miss Himura! And if you don't leave my Papa alone she's gonna hurt you!!!!!!" The Battousai's eyes widened and the sword clattered to the ground.

Kaoru stepped backwards and looked at him wide eyed. "You're lying" Battousai said, gripping the sword at Kisatsu's throat with both hands. Kaoru growled. "You're right, my name is Kaoru Kamiya and I'm the 2nd Master of the Kamiya Kasshin, will you stand down or fight?" Rukea gasped and Kisatsu eyed her strangely. It made sense to him oddly, though it could never be true. But this women did resemble his daughter.

Battousai's mouth curled into a sneer. "I have no wish to fight you or kill any of this family. My mission is to bring the Master of the Kasshin style to meet my Lord. So if there are 2 Masters you have a choice, which will come with me?"

Kaoru snorted. "You expect us to believe that? What of all these slaughtered men lying on the dojo floor. Why were they killed?" Battousai's cold eyes bored into her again. "They are dead because they are assassins. The Kasshin's Master would be valuable to our cause. We have come to collect him. That is my assignment, no one must harm him until he has met my Lord."

Kaoru watched as her mother trembled and baby Kaoru wept. They knew what this meant. If Battousai's Lord wanted Kisatsu to fight for them, there was no choice. "You have come for a Master of the Kasshin" Kaoru spat. "I am also a Master. You will leave him here and I shall take his place." Silence filled the dojo. Kisatsu looked at her, his face set in a stern line. "No" he said shortly. "Battousai has come for me. I shall go."

Kaoru felt anger burn within her and it overflowed. "Don't be an idiot Papa! I'm going look after Mama and me okay!" she gave little Kaoru a wink and suddenly mini Kaoru understood. That was her up there telling the Battousai off. That was the lady she'd become. She felt pride well within her at how she'd grow up. "You go with him Miss Himura!..I mean Me! I'll make sure Mama and Papa are safe for you always!"

Kaoru smiled at her little self. "I trust you." Then she fixed a stotic stare on the Battousai. "Are we going or not?" Battousai removed the sword from Kisatsu's throat. "It will be a camp full of men looking for a women to have for pleasure. Will you trade youself in this man's place knowing the consquences?"

Kaoru snorted. "Don't be a baka all your life Kenshi....Battousai, I know the consquences and I'm a big girl. If they want to mess with me, they're in for an unpleasant surprise." Battousai sheathed his sword. "So be it." Then he grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the dojo, leaving a dumbstruck family in his wake.

******

Kaoru glared at the Battousai. "Y'know my arm needs to be in it's socket if I'm gonna be wielding a sword." His face remained impassive and his silence seemed to cut through the daylight, making everything become darker. "Geez," she muttered. "Kenshin never told me he used to be so grumpy all the time." Though she knew he had reason to be. She'd feel pretty grumpy too if her life mission was to kill everyone all the time.

"Where are we going again?" she asked confused to where he was leading her. Wasn't his Master supposed to have a big castle and roam around going 'Look at me, I have the best assassin in Japan'? Battousai gave her a fleeting look. As if reading her thoughts he pointed to the "Whore House" she'd wondered into last night. "WHAT!" she exclaimed loudly, clutching his arm in a death grip. Half the people on the street stopped and gave walked around them so that there was no one near them for a 3 metre radius.

It was understandable of course why people avoided them. The girl was obviously insane. With a horrified look plastered on her face and with her fingers imbedded into the man's skin. Then the man with his looming black aura and dangerously twitching eye. Yes, it was better to give these people a wide brith.

Battousai tried to ignore the girl's insane muttering about 'Stupid Lords' and 'Infactuation with geisha girls'. But on the overall he wasn't doing much good. She was pretty. He admitted that and he liked her temper all though that feature also pissed him off. Which was funny because he hardly ever got mad at someone.

Grunting he shifted his arm, that was being clawed to death by this strange women. He hadn't questioned her yet about how she knew his name and how she called to him with such familiarity, nor how she'd used his last name as her own. But the time would come. And he'd either ask permission to kill her or leave her be. He was curious, but he was also cautious. If his name was out on the streets it could but his statis as 'Shadow Assassin' at stake. He needed to know what she knew and if she didn't tell him.....well, there were darker aspects of his job that didn't include killing. Sometimes he gathered information and sometimes people didn't want to speak....

Ignoring her protests he dragged her through the door. As the door shut behind them Kaoru felt a horrible feeling of forboding. 'That's it, I'm never going to wish for anything again!!!' Then as she shifted her feet and walked slowly behind the Battousai she felt uneasy. A sickening crack echoed and Kaoru felt pain sear across her back. She turned and came face to face with one of the men from last night. "You should never have come back here." he snarled. His face contorted and he resmebled a rabid dog.

Kaoru whipped her bokken from her obi and smacked him across the head. "I've no patience at the moment." The bar went silent and she followed the Battousai into a back room.

  
  
  


**'Carnation's Comments**

Hey guys, I'm sorry that I've been so sick and lugged down with homework. This chapter isn't as long as I promised I know and I appologise. I was going to get my brother Theo to type this up for me but his English is horrible and I couldn't stand what he might say to my reviewers. (He's my twin brother and he has so much blackmail crap on me it's not funny) I wanna thank you all for the reviews!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU ALL!!! But if I wanna post this today I can't write back to you all. At the end of this fic, I'm gonna have a review chapter in which I say something to all my reviewers. 

**PLEASE KEEP THE REVIEWS COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

Now, here's the Teaser:

**Chapter 3:**

The hallway was dark and it stuck a nerve in her heart. She felt fear rise within her. Was it really worth it? To kill someone just so she could save Kenshin in the future? She'd made a wish to save his true love. Not to kill someone for him. She dropped the sword and turned away. "I won't kill, not for you. Not to save my life. I'm sorry" He watched her with flickering eyes. "So be it" 

**Quotacular:**

Let the sleeper sleep until a dream brings her back to the world.  
_- 'Carnation's Saying _


	5. Into the Lion's Den

**Title:** Dance of Fireflies  
**Author:** Third_ReInCaRnAtIoN  
**Disclaimer:** I sit with my banjo and I play a little song, even though Kenshin's not mine, his friends can play along. I'll pretend to own him my imagination's that great, I even own Inuyasha in my delirious state. All the characters I own, they will all be main and when I finish the epilogue I'll loose them all again.   
**Summary:** Sometimes we sacrifice ourselves for the ones we love, even if they don't remember us afterwards. Battousai/Kaoru

**Chapter 3**

_'You need not to be a smart man to conquer a nation, you need only to be ruthless.'_  
**- A saying I made up from reading too many Samurai books.**

Whilst Kaoru was following the Battousai through a series of dark, twisting tunnels beneath the bar, the Kenshin of her time was dreaming. His eyes moved frantically beneath his closed eyelids and his grip on his sword was so tight that his knuckles were white.

He mumbled lowly as he drempt, in a pitch so low that it seemed he was not speaking words, but humming a dark tune of things not yet said or done. Lightning silenced his mutters as it illuminated the room and sent him sprawling across the floor, his legs positioned uncomfortably beneath his body, only half awake. The tatami floor grazed his hands and he pulled himself until he was crouched in a sqauting poistion with his weight balanced on his sword that was stuck into the mat.

"Oroooo" he exclaimed, waiting for his eyes to stop swirling and for his vision to clear. As his voice reverberated off the walls he winced. All day he'd been trying to avoid Kaoru. He'd noticed she hadn't been sleeping very well. The bags under her eyes and her quiet sullen temper were only a testiment of the illness he knew she suffered from. He didn't wish to give her an excuse for being awake. A darker voice in him, the one that made sure that he observed everything and knew everything like the hitokiri he once was, whispered to him.

Kenshin squashed the voice ruthlessly, as ruthlessly as he had once carved his beliefs in the bodies of others with his sword. He tried to ignore what the voice was so eager to tell him. To tell him that he was responsible for Kaoru's illness. He feared that voice for the revelations it could bring him about himself.

He feared it more than the loss of his own life, but less than he feared hurting Kaoru with an action that the voice had driven him to. That was why he killed whenever it reared it's ugly head. He supressed it and cut it into shreds with his mind in every way that he had ever cut a human using the Misturugi Ryu. But it was a disease that refused to die. It had rooted himself within his mind and he often found himself wondering if perhaps he'd been born with it, or that maybe he was insane. Finally driven from sanity by the ghosts of those past slaughtered.

He shuddered and looked at the sword in his hands. He hadn't taken up his vow not to kill as a form of retribution. No, he knew he was far beyond that. He'd killed too many people to find any measure of peace in this lifetime. Maybe even in his next three he would still be paying for his crimes. He did not know and even though he was living the happiest days of his life with his adopted family in the dojo, there was still no real peace.

It would have been easier, he realised, if he could belive Kaoru-dono's innocent assumption that he and Battousai were seperate entities. For Kenshin, Battousai was an illusion. He was the Battousai, he would always be, they were one. He had done all those things back then, just as he had done all the things he had when he was living with Kaoru. His facade as a Rurouni had just been convinient. It was easier to refrain from having to hurt someone badly enough to kill them when you didn't stay in once place long enough to want to. At the beginning, his vow had seemed so simple, with the rebellion over and the shogunate disapanded. But in truth, Kenshin reflected, if he had made the vow to himself for himself instead of for the sake of Tomoe's memory, he would have broken it more than once.

He sighed as Kaoru's pale face flashed into his mind. 'I killed my wife' probably wasn't the smartest way to break the news of he and Tomoe to her. She'd seemed so sad when he'd seen her this afternoon, clutching the firefly to her as if it was her last remain of warmth in the world, as if she let it go she would fade until she lay silenced and cold on a funeral pyre. He never wanted to be breathing in this world if she wasn't. For that thought alone he wanted to kneel on the floor and plunge his trusted sword into his stomach. If was dishonorable to Kaoru for him to want her as a possession. For that's what it was. He didn't love her. He didn't...couldn't love anyone. He gave up love the second Tomoe died and never intended to pick it up again no matter what it might cost him in the future.

Each time he thought of her and his adopted family and friends he felt that maybe he was betraying them. He should have loved them... he was fond of them and he protected them, but he felt that maybe that was for selfish reasons. They were his comfort. He wished he knew what his true feelings about them were. He was fond of them, but was fondness enough if his true reason of staying with them was to use them as tools for his comfort and to ignore their value as human beings. Where they just tools? He agonised. He tried denying it to himself and the words tasted hollow. But then when he thought of Kaoru's face, guilt overwelmed him and he felt as if he should fall to his knees. He remembered Kaoru looking at him with her false smile after he told her about Tomoe, her eyes glazed. He rationalised that she needed to know. Tomoe was his first love his one true love in his mind. Should others not be allowed to carry her memory in their hearts as he did?

Yet that thought rang of irony and he knew he'd told Kaoru about Tomoe because he was afraid. He may be stupid at times but his was forever observant, noticing things others would not. Tasting things on the wind, smelling emotions on people and understanding what others could not. Kaoru loved him so obviously, so completley, so innocently that he was scared. Kenshin could see it and prayed to Kami that the wedge he'd purposely driven between them would stop her from looking at him with such happiness and adoration that he felt as if he should smile just as brightly back at her.

His fear was crisp and the dark voice he'd struggled to opress overpowered him. 'You're scared because you like her.' It whispered so deceptively soft and calm. Kenshin struggled but it would not go away. 'Of course I like Kaoru-dono!' he retorted angrily. 'She took me in knowing my past, a stranger who was covered in sin, That she DID!' He breathing thickened as the internal battle raged. The voice laughed mockingly. 'She is rather attractive, that she is,' it sneered. 'A bit vicious, but I'll be surprised if she isn't proposed to soon. Do you think this man will let you stay? Or do you plan to kill him so you can stay by Kaoru's side as she becomes old, alone and unloved. To let her become the idle gossip of the towns women. " That Kamiya woman" they'll say. "Letting that murderer stay will her, it's undecent, she's sinful. Stay away from her." Are you that much a coward?'

Kenshin's conscience remained sullenly quiet, unaware that what the voice suggested had pretty much been his future plan. He'd suggest to leave of course, it was the honorable thing to do, but Kaoru would beg him to stay and he would. He jumped to his feet and started to pace, his sword clattering to the ground. He tried to shake away the awful thought that had entered his head.

He needed to meditate he decided. He sat calmly opposed to the inner turmoil that was writhing within him. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing. Inhale, heartbeat, exhale. He continued on this pattern for a couple of minutes then let his mind drift. He heard Yahiko's soft heartbeat fluttering in his depth of slumber, Sanosuke's loud obtrusive snoring that could wake a hibernating bear and Kaoru's........Kaoru's.......His eyes shot open. Where was Kaoru? He couldn't sense her at all. Not even her breathing. Panic scalded it's way across his skin and he bolted to his feet, grabbed his sword and headed straight to her room. He paused at her door and took a deep breath. If she caught him she would turn him into sashimi. Embarassment darkened his features as her called out to her quietly. "Kaoru-dono? It's Kenshin, are you there?" No one replied his query and he hesitated before reaching for the door.

He opened the door slowly waiting for an bowl of some sort to fly out and smack him square in the head. Idly he wondered if perhaps Kaoru was his most dangerous opponent of all those he had fought. Those bowls were pretty hefty and when they came into contact with the skin.....sword wounds hurt less. He hadn't realised how easily his Rurouni character had slid back on.

He walked in quietly, with the stealth that only someone learnt in the ways of the Mitsurugi Ryu can have. It took a couple of heartbeats for his mind to register and comprehend what his eyes saw. Kaoru's room was in chaos. Shoji ripped, ornaments lying smashed and her futon had been shredded. Kenshin reacted without thought. He unsheathed his sword and held it at the ready in case someone decided to attack. His scolded himself firmly. He should have heard this, he should have sensed it too. His anger at himself stopped him from worrying about Kaoru.

The room was empty. He ran to Sanosuke and woke him roughly. Sanosuke woke blearily, half ready for battle. "Whaddaya want? Have you lost it Kenshin. It's still dark leave me alone." He rolled over and tugged his clothing from Kenshin's grasp. Sanosuke was just about to start snoring when Kenshin pulled him to his feet and pinned him against the wall. "Kaoru's missing." Kenshin said dangerously. "Someone's been here and none of us heard them. Stay here and look after Yahiko." Sanosuke's eye sight may have been blurred by sleep, but he could have sworn that he saw a glimpse of amber shredding through Kenshin's violet gaze before he tore off into the night. Sanosuke shook his head slowly as he moved towards the brat's room. Kami have mercy on the man that had invoked Kenshin's fierce temper and taken Jou-chan from them.

**********

Kaoru sighed as another minute passed. The air was scorched and stifling and she found herself wanting to carefully hide her nose within the sleeve of her kimono discreetly so that the Battousai wouldn't notice. It seemed as if she'd been underground for the most of the afternoon and she pined for the sunlight. For in the tunnels there was nothing but blackness and the feel of dust as it floated around her with each step she took. Occationally a flaming torch lighted the pathway just enough so that she could see where the Battousai was and that the path was getting steeper.

She'd stumbled several times already and her toes were sore. If she squinted at them enough through the darkness she could almost swear they were swollen too. She sighed again. It exploded from her mouth and she winced in horror sure that the Battousai was about to turn around and reprimand her. He however ignored her as he had for the most of the afternoon. In fact, he hadn't said anything to her since they'd walked into the building. They'd quietly walked, or stumbled in her case, not only in darkness but absolute silence and it was driving her crazy.

A torch illuminated the pitch black tunnel and she saw the back of the Battousai's head, his ponytail bobbing up and down as he walked. It was a lilting walk almost as if he was limping, but she knew very well that he didn't limp in her time. As the light started to fade she caught a sight of a dark patch on his clothing.Blood. She gasped audibly and this time he stopped and turned around slowly glaring at her as if she was the cole source of the world's problems. Never being one to back down from a fight, even when it wasn't good for her health, she drew herself up to her full height, hands on her hips and glowered back at him. "I'm not quite sure what you think you're trying to threaten me with Battousai," she hissed. "But I think you'd better bind whatever wound you have on your leg that's bleeding all over the tunnel floor before you pass out and we're stuck in utter darkness."

His eyes narrowed and it took all her will not to flinch away. "Unlike your untrained self," he started in a voice strained with bitten back anger. "My eyesight is fine, I can see where we are going at all times and as for this mere cut, I didn't feel it at all." He turned away with a disgusted look in her direction then started to walk away at a fast pace. "Now," she heard him call out from the path ahead. "Do you think you can move or will you make me regret not bringing the other Kasshin Master?" Her eyes flared and she ran after him throwing the only retort she had left that she knew would push his buttons.

"You were limping you baka! And you're blood is a testament to how deep that 'mere cut' is! It's almost flooding the ground." She heard a growl and could have sworn she saw his amber eyes radiating their own light. She halted in her steps, once again snubbing toes on a rock. Now irritated beyond belief, she was ready to strangle the mighty shadow assassin where he stood. Who cared if he was carrying a katana, she was still Kaoru and had the power of the right hook. As they continued to both snarl at each other a cheerful voice rang from the shadows.

"Is that you Himura? It's about time! Katsura's been waiting for you. Have you brought the Kasshin Mas...." Whoever had been talking, choked off their sentence and Kaoru found herself once again in eerie silence. A tall, gangly man appeared from the shadows and stared at her. She figited uncomfortably until the Battousai appeared by the man's side, still looking at her horribly.

Kaoru observed the man. He was about 3 feet taller than Kenshin, not that it was hard and bared a resemblence to Sanosuke except that this man's skin sagged towards the ground, his hair wasn't quite as high and his eyes not as slanted. He carried a sword and Kaoru suspected that the stains she first assumed were rust were in reality blood.

His stuck his hand out in a warm gesture that made Kaoru instantly suspicious. If this was the hitokiri she expected he was, she had alot of qualms about taking up his hand. He smiled brightly and she saw that some of his teeth were missing and chipped. "I'm Umori Gentachi. Nice to meet you." Kaoru hesitantly placed her hand in his enormous palm and she prayed he wouldn't fist hers in his and crush her bones. Instead of what she feared he'd do he did something startling. He pulled her closer and before she hand time to think his lips were on hers. She shuddered in revultion and pulled away. He held her by the forearms and whispered, his breath so foul that she smelt the sake on his words. "'Bout time that Battousai kid brought home a whore."

Kaoru ripped herself from his grasp, pulled out her bokken, crouched to the ground and lunged forward shattering his shin bone. Three things happened instantaniously. The man, Umori, fell to the ground with a yell of pain, Kaoru rolled as she hit the ground and turned around, her bokken pointed threateningly in his direction and the Battousai appeared behind her and grabbed her harshly. Kaoru fought him as a reflex then felt her world darkening as his fingers hit a pressure point in her neck.

**********

Kaoru felt her hearing come back first but not matter how she strained she still couldn't move a muscle. Voices mummered lowly and she resigned herself to listening carefully until she had enough strength to jump to her feet and bolt away.

"What is your verdict, is she worth keeping, will she be any good to our cause?" a quiet voice asked. Kaoru immediatley recognised Kenshin...the Battousai's voice and she felt her body tense in alarm. Another voice answered in reply. It was deeper and kinder almost, it didn't hold the promising threat that the Battousai's did. She made out the words.

"Yes, but you must test her, she comes from a family that does not kill. It's expressive that she floored Umori, he has about 4 feet on her?" Kaoru almost felt the Battousai nodding. "It was surprising. I thought she was going to slap him and instead she incapacitated him and men wonder why I never take whores to my bed, liars, spies all of them. It's such as easy way for the Shogunate to tap into our systems. We must never allow it."

Kaoru once again felt the gesture, rather than seeing it. She felt the unknown man, who seemed to be the commander, shrug. "What can I do Kenshin?" he asked solemly. "These men could die at any given moment, why not let them have their pleasures while they live? Is it wrong to deny a man of happiness before death?"

Kaoru listened intently and tried to ignore the niggling feeling in her nose. She heard one of them stand and sigh. "You can't deny them anything Katsura, you're far to merciful with them." She heard the man, Katsura, she presumed, chuckle. "Aa, what of this girl then, were you not merciful when you realised she knew you somehow? She's still breathing, you did not slay her on the spot as is bidden of you."

Kaoru's breath froze in her throat as the clang of a sword being drawn split the air. "If you bid it of me I will slay her now." The Battousai's voice was scary and Kaoru wanted to suddenly jump up and run screaming for the hills, not that she'd be any safer from him there.

Katsura's voice was soft and firm in reply. "I have no wish of her death Kenshin. She's done nothing wrong and I doubt she has any opinion, or even cares about the revolution. What I want to know is if she will be any use to us as a warrior, as a spy. But I need to test her. I need to know if she can kill with no hesitation."

She heard the Battousai's bated breath and then he sheathed his sword. "I think that this test you proposed earlier, I think she will fail it." She heard movement, the rustling of clothing and she imagined that he had sat down again. "In the dojo....we fought and she threw a sword at me and even when it would have only injured me slightly....she still called my name to warn me." There was more rustling and the clank of china and Kaoru wondered if they actually looked as strange as they did in her imagination. Two assassin's having a tea party.

She heard Katsura's serious voice reply. "If she fails the test... kill her." Kaoru's heartbeat sped up and she felt sweat form on her palms. She didn't want to die. Fear pounded through her and she thought desperatley of home. Kenshin, Sanosuke, Yahiko, Megumi, Tae, Tsubame, Ayame, Suzume and Dr Gensai. Depression clawed at her as she remembered her stupid wish. Now stuck in the past where the danger was real and here she had no friends, family or anyone to protect her. 'What have you gotten yourself into' she thought mournfully holding back tears and hoping that neither Katsura or the Battousai would notice.

Unfortunatley luck decided that it would not be with her and she felt the Battousai standing above her and she knew that he was probably waiting for an excuse to impale her or something. She knew that the Battousai was also Kenshin and every death added to his sword would pain him, but she also knew that this was a time of confusion and chaos, where the strong willed and the cold hearted were the only ones that survived. Battousai would survive because he was what he was.

"I know you're awake." he whispered sinisterly. Kaoru shuddered and opened her eyes slowly. Giving him a sheepish, fear filled smile she replied. "Hi?" Katsura walked towards the small pile of cushions they'd dumped her on and she got her first glimpse of the man that seemed to be running the revolution from her point of view. His was taller than Kenshin, but not by much and had a hair of think brown, straight hair. His eyes were brown and held laughter, though if you looked deeper you'd find something much darker than was normal in any other man.

He extended a hand and Kaoru looked at it warily, the other man who'd held out his hand hadn't been proper. Battousai gave her a threatening look and Kaoru quickly took Katsura's hand. She'd used up her quota for bravery today. Katsura's hands were soft, softer than hers and she felt a slight pang of femine shame. She consoled herself with the fact that this man was a politician, not a swordsman or swords woman as she.

"As you've probably overheard," he said his smile bright on his face. "I intend to test you on how well you can kill." Kaoru shuddered away then she felt self rightious anger burn it's way through her.  
"I heard you..you despicable, cruel, heartless, tyrant..." she would have continued but the Battousai's hand had clamped itself over her mouth. "Shut up." he hissed.

Katsura laughed throatily and Kaoru blinked, unaware that the Battousai had silenced her with a gentle hand and not by slashing her with his sword. Katsura contiued laughing and Kaoru saw the Battousai's face become stone-like as her removed his hand. "Such a temper," Katsura choked out, finally managing to speak. "I expect you to use it well. Battousai, I'll leave you to explain to her and to take her to the test, just as we discussed earlier." Then with a sweeping bow, Katsura turned and walked out the room.

**********

Kaoru looked at the Battousai cautiously after Katsura had left the room. And then she gulped at the pure fury in his eyes. "What do you think you're doing," his voice was harder than stone and she felt adenline start flooding her body. Then there was that little voice that insisted 'Run Kaoru Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!' She gulped and smiled slightly.  
"Er, showing that man that he can't force me to kill anyone?"

The Battousai growled and puched the wall. "Are you DENSE!" he all but shouted. "Do you want me to kill you?" Kaoru shook her head. "No, I prefer breathing." she said honestly.  
"Then keep your mouth shut around Katsura and kill whoever he tells you to."  
Kaoru's spine seemed to crumble beneath her and she slouched forward. "I don't want to kill anyone" she said passionatley. He felt like sighing in despair and shaking her roughly. He didn't know why and he didn't care. But this girl this innocent, stupid, opinionated girl was turning his temper into one with such a short fuse that it exploded every few seconds.  
In the minds of those he worked with, he had no temper. He was cold and emotionless but in his own eyes....he felt a little lost. This girl was rearranging everything without any idea she was doing so.

Kaoru stared at the Battousai forcing her stubbon streak down. Calmly she nodded gracefully and moved till she was facing the Battousai directly. "What is this test?" she asked, her mouth drawn to a disgruntled pout. Battousai's icy temprement slid on easily like water over a waterfall.

"There's a prisoner, a traitor we're been questioning and Katsura has decided he shall be your test. I am to take you to him now so that you can kill him." Kaoru's mouth became a grim line. "The you'd best take me to him." she said softly. Battousai nodded and turned, heading towards the door. Distracted by thoughts of her dilemma, to kill or to die, she didn't really take in her surroundings, she did however realise that the Battousai was still walking with a limp.

"Stop." she commanded and she waited for the Battousai to turn and bite her head off. To her surprise, he did exactly as she asked and shot her a confused look. She smiled brightly and motioned for him to sit down. "You're still bleeding from that 'mere cut'." 

He frowned and hoisted up the hem of his hakama to find a long gash that slid in a diagonal line from his knee to his ankle. Kaoru winced as she saw it and felt like berating the Battousai for being so careless. Sighing she walked across the room to where the Battousai and Katsura had been having tea and pulled out the sash from her mother's inner robe. She dampened it with hot tea and turned to find the Battousai sitting on the cushions that she'd been lying on. Silently she went to work, wiping away blood and hoping the hot tea would kill any germs that wanted to infect or poison the wound.

Finally as she began to wrap the cut she glanced up at him. His eyes while still being their ferocious amber had flecks of violet streaking across them. "How did you manage to let someone cut you like this?" she asked gently.

He grunted. "I slipped." Kaoru stopped, stunned that he'd admit such a mistake then continued as if it was no big deal. Sighing as she patted the bandage down she tried to quell her panic attack as she realised what she was about to do. She was about to kill someone, to go against her father's teacher and the moral of her sword style. 'Kami forgive me.' she begged. She didn't yet know if she could go through with, she prayed she'd know when she got there. Waiting patiently for Battousai to lead the way, she mentally began searching her heart. Did she love Kenshin enough to kill for him?

*********

The hallway was dark and it stuck a nerve in her heart, she'd walked from that hallway to this room. She felt fear rise within her. Was it really worth it? To kill someone just so she could save Kenshin in the future? She looked at the sword that the Battousai had given her before they'd entered the room. She turned and looked at the man Katsura had told her to kill. He was bound and gagged, bleeding here and there. She felt bile rise within her throat. Kami had given her an answer. She'd die before she killed someone. She'd made a wish to save Kenshin's true love. Not to kill someone for him.

She dropped the sword and turned away from the battered man. He'd been through enough and maybe death would be peaceful for him. But she could not give it to him "I won't kill, not for you. Not to save my life. I'm sorry." She realised she'd resigned herself to death with that simple sentence and her eyes stung with tears. He watched her with flickering eyes. "So be it" 

She flinched away waiting for his sword to behead her or worse. She heard the steel being drawn from it's sheath and she took in a deep shuddery sigh waiting to be taken away from this world and spirited to the next. However she didn't feel a swish of air above her neck or a slicing pain as a sword buried itself within her and she didn't hear a chime sound of a sword catching on her spine. The only thing she heard was a soft moan and then a keening sound, as if a tree were falling to it's knees. She opened one eye cautiously and saw the dead body of the prisoner infront of her lying on the floor, his blood seeping into the tatami.

Her eyes sought out the Battousai and amber met blue in one instant of understanding. He flicked the blood from his sword and broke the connection between them. As he strode out the door he paused and turned his head to the side.  
"Don't tell anyone." he whispered. Then he walked away.

Kaoru looked at the body of the prisoner then back to the door the Battousai had exited from and she wondered if the Battousai had just purposley saved her life.

**'Carnation's Comments**

Heya! I'm back in action. I've tried to make this 10 pages but it may be less because I don't have enough time to write them all if I want to post tonight. Anyway, you may, or may not have heard that my computer crashed two months ago so I wasn't able to post or even write the next chapter of this story, I'd even written half of this chapter on the other computer when it crashed. ARGH! 

It was horrible. But I'm back and I'm here to stay. I've already thought about the plot and I know what's going to happen, hehe. Normally when I write I have no idea until I start writing and it just appears! But anyway, I hope my loyal reviewers aren't angry and me.

**Okay guys, you know the drill. This is where I beg for reviews. Please don't stop reviewing me because of the chapter delay. I tried everything to get that computer to work! EVERYTHING! I even begged it and patted it and CLEANED it. Please, if you want the next chapter review me, as I said earlier I don't want to continue writing a story that no one likes when I have so many other ideas for stories that people like to read.**

Teaser Time:

**Chapter 4:**

Hontaru looked at Kaoru saddly. "It's a vision of the future, flashes of that which has yet to come. Please Kaoru, just wish it of me. Don't do it, please don't pay this price, it's much to large. No one should ask it of you, not even the one you love." Kaoru smiled saddly, wondering exactly what the flashes of images frozen in time meant. "If someone has to pay the price," she said softly. "It should be me, I can't ask it of any other." She met the goddesses eyes dead on. "Why is there so much misery in this world Hontaru?" her voice trembled. Hontaru smiled a watery smile. "Kami does not wish you unhappiness, he bears you no ill will." Something sparked in Hontaru's eyes and Kaoru looked at her questioningly. "He bears you no ill will at all." And she vanished.

**Quotacular:**

Such is life.   
_-Ned Kelly_


End file.
